Self love is the highest form of love. It is not selfish - it is about the journey to learn you, love you, appreciate you, be responsible for you so you can live & be your authentic geniune self.
This is the true form of attracting all good things that were created just for you.
Vibe High - Love B.
Follow on FB & IG & all podcast platforms Bianca On Self Love
Self love is the highest form of love. It is not selfish - it is about the journey to learn you, love you, appreciate you, be responsible for you so you can live & be your authentic geniune self.
This is the true form of attracting all good things that were created just for you.
Vibe High - Love B.
Follow on FB & IG & all podcast platforms Bianca On Self Love
Hey, what's up, gain? It's your girl. Bianca renee. Bianca on self love. Welcome to my podcast. This podcast to basically teach you, show you, help you learn not only how to love yourself, but how to set boundaries completely do you? And learn how to heal from the pain and trauma that cause you to not love yourself in the first place. I'm your Girl bianca renee on bianca and Self love. Follow me on Instagram, Facebook, Facebook, Twitter and on All Podcast platform is your girl be Renee. Hollah at me. Remember, it's self love of everything. Let's go. Hey, gang, what's up? It's Bianca. Renee here. Bianca on self love. How are you guys doing today? I hope you guys are having a chill morning or a nice night or afternoon. So if you don't know, this is season two. Welcome. If you haven't had a chance to listen to season one, please do so. Bianca's Self Love is on all podcast channels. If this is your first time listening to me, it's not on my voice. Thank you. So happy that you're here. My podcast is all about self love, self awareness, the journey, and self love. And I also include God in my podcast channel. I am a realist transparent on most topics, but I've gone through the self love journey for the past nine years, and over the past five years is how I really came in tune with myself. If you listen to my podcast, I always say I thought I really knew what self love was until something traumatizing happened in my life and it caused me to love myself more than I ever have before. So welcome. I'm so excited that you're here. This episode of season two is all about relationships. The specific episodes are about mirror, mirror on the wall. Am I the one who holds it all as I go and talk about relationships? And I will have guests on this season as well. It's more about self awareness, perspective, holding yourself accountable in every aspect of relationships that you can think of, whether it's marriage, whether it's a divorce, whether it's a career, coworkers, family, friends, any type of relationship that you're in. I'm going to get dad in a nitty gritty and we're going to talk about it. And we're going to talk about how those experiences is a direct reflection to not only you while you're looking in the mirror, facing yourself, but also to how you show up in relationships. Are you ready for it? One thing about selflove is not always easy, but our promise is worth it. So let's get started. So have you ever been in a relationship or had this type of experience where you knew that how you were inside came from a place that you did not want to focus on? Like, say, for example, near childhood, and you maybe had some type of traumatic experience that happened to you instead of talking to someone about it? You hold that in and never talk about it. You get older and you still have these thoughts and things in your mind on what you're supposed to do, but you're not making a decision to talk to anyone. So what do you do? Some people may work all day, 24 hours a day, sun up, sun down. Some people are working to not deal with that trauma, right. Or issue or experience or even something someone said to you as a child. I don't think people realize whether you're a friend or parent when you say stuff to people as children that sticks with them for a long time if you don't correct it. And the other perspective, since we're talking about mirror, mirror on the wall, for those who may be on the receiving end, my question to you is have you ever told them how you felt? So it's about self awareness, right? So let's get back to the trauma or experiences that you've had in your life that may have been super bad. And you're an adult now and you have not dealt with it and you are still not dealing with it, but you want to love yourself some more. You want to be in this perfect relationship and have this perfect marriage or maybe have these friends and you still not showing up for you. So my question to you is based on our theme, mirror, mirror on the wall, am I the one who holds it all? And you are because how dare you? And I keep it real with you. I keep it 100 I love you, but I'm going to keep it real. Why are you showing up or want to show up in someone else's life as a friend, potential partner, co worker, I don't know, business partner? Why do you want to show up in their lives and put your all if you can't show up for you? That's the piece where self love gets tricky because instead of us sort of dealing with our own issue, we know what love is. We know what that is, right? So I have love, for example. I'm not saying me in general, but say in general. Like you say, I have love. I can go give my love to a friend or partner and I support them and I'm going to be there all. But who's being there all for you? You still have these experiences in your head, in your mind, that's consuming you every single day. Even if you don't think about it, it's still consuming you and you don't want to deal with it. But you want to show up and love somebody else. There's some self awareness here and the lack of self awareness will decrease your ability to move forward, right? Your reflection of who you're looking at is not the same person that's in that mirror. And the perspective that you're giving other people by showing up in their lives and what's really true to you is not the same person. I want to live in authenticity. I want to be genuine with me. I want to be honest with myself, right? So during my self love journey, I said, look, I can't keep involving myself in these relationships because all I'm doing is masking it, right? Mask on, mask off. I'm masking it because I'm really not being my true self because I didn't heal at the time. So I was jumping in and out of relationships, trying to have my pain fulfilled with nonsense and toxicity and becoming a person that I know I'm not. Like, this is the piece where relationships, friends or career, whatever, selflove gain is so important because your relationship with yourself is going to be a direct reflection who you are in a relationship with. If you're toxic to yourself, you're going to be in a toxic environment. You're going to be in a toxic relationship, period. I've been there. I could be wrong. But I'm just saying this is my experience because what else are you doing to get out of that toxic relationship? Because it's like oil and water. You don't need to be there. It's not soothing you. It's not part of your journey. So let me check myself and let me respectfully bow out because this isn't me. Or you can stay in there for the rest of your life. And some people do. Some people never go on the journey to say, you know what? I got to check me. Let me look in the mirror quick because, yes, I do hold it all. But I have to make the decision to say, am I going to start? You know what I'm saying, cleaning up my mess. Am I going to start getting out of this toxic relationship? Am I going to start, stop looking at the phone and see if this person has called or text me in five days? Am I going to stop doing that? Or am I just going to live the rest of my life wondering what it would be like to really love myself so I can start attracting different things and different people who will love me? It starts with you. Mirror, mirror, on the wall, am I the one who holds it all? The question you have to ask that to yourself. Think about that. Because sometimes we project our pain on other people and then we want them to be the person to hold all the answers to all of our problems and solve all of our pain from childhood. Like, you get in this one relationship and you meet this man, for example, ladies, and you say, he is the best man I've ever seen in my life. He is so charismatic. He's fine, by the way. He looks good. He loves himself, good characteristics. I like, he's going to solve all my problems because he loves me. Wrong. You are going to project your trauma and your pain on that person. And I promise you, if you don't clean up your act, they're going to walk away. If they don't, you make something that's really good, bad. You know what I'm saying? You don't want to do that. I'm just saying to you, you have to love you first before you lean on anyone else's shoulder at any time of night. And when your eyes closed, you're not thinking about them and you all together. You're thinking about what your mom or dad have maybe said or done to you or what your sister or brother have maybe said or done to you. You don't want that. At least try to get some type of healing and start this self love journey so you can bring those up and face yourself and say, I have to deal with this. If I don't deal with this, I won't be able to let anyone in and I will not be my authentic, genuine self in any relationship. And then when this happens, you're going to come up with some things that are not going to make you feel good and you're going to want to tap out during this self love journey. So this season, in season two, my goal is to walk you through some things that I have gone through in my self love journey. In regards to relationships, it's been a lot. That thing that I said a minute ago that I was projecting my pain on other people, I've done that. And at the time, I didn't know I was doing it. Like I said, something had to occur in my life for me to be self aware of what I was doing and how I showed up in people's lives, right? And then at the same time, how my door kept revolving for people to come in and out, showing up in my life who didn't really need to be there because I wasn't self aware of what the heck I was dealing with. I was on autopilot thinking I'm good and happy and ignoring my pain and having these voids fill with, like, aluminum foil. That doesn't feel good. I'd rather have it filled with, I don't know, lily pops and popsicles instead of aluminum foil, you know what I'm saying? But either way, it's bad. I can't have somebody else come in and fill my voids. Like I have to heal my voids. So the other piece to the self awareness and the mirror on the wall, who's the one that holds it all is one thing that I learned is what you want others to do for you and who they are are two different things. Because sometimes when you go through things in life, whether you're a child or an adult, maybe you got fired from your job, maybe you lost some money somehow, maybe you are financially hurt. And I know there's a lot going on in life right now and it's kind of tough for us all. Money is a factor. I don't care how much money you make. People are losing their homes, they're getting evicted. There's a lot that's going on. And you are thinking to yourself, how the heck am I going to get out of this? What am I going to do? The first thing I always say for me is pray, go to God, but don't pray and don't act, okay? And the other piece is ask for some help. Some people. My grandma always says, a closed mouth does not get fed. If you have pride, let that go during this season because everybody's going to need help, okay? I don't care who you are. You need some sort of assistance, period. The other thing with self awareness is what you want others to do for you. And who they are, like I said before, is two different things. Sometimes you feel like that person is supposed to be accountable for your actions that you're making in that relationship. And then you want them to be something that they're not created to be. And that's not how they're built. That's not how God made them. God didn't put this lady in your life to walk all over her. That's not why she's there, son. That's not why she's there. You're sitting here abusing her and walking all over her, and you're not appreciating to her. You're not communicating with her because you have problems within yourself and you have pain and trauma that you haven't dealt with. But you want her to be this stepping stone. I'm not the stepping stone. You want her to be this submissive person so you could just walk all over her. And that's not who she is. That's not what God created her to be. That's not even who she wants to be. You know what I'm saying? So what you want others to do for you and who they actually are are two different things. And I promise you, when that person realizes what you're doing and if they have any sense, they should walk away because it's a train wreck. And it's going to continue at 360 cycle in any relationship that you have, whether you are a woman or a man, like, any relationship that you have is going to continue into this 360 cycle until you take the opportunity to say, you know what? I need to check me. I need to go talk to somebody about the way my mom hit me when I was a child. Or I need to go talk to somebody about how I slept on a porch when I was four years old or five years old at my grandma house. Like, I need to go talk to somebody how I was physically abused in my relationship. I need to go talk to somebody of how I had someone was racist against me. Like, these things come up and we have to deal with them, but you cannot deal with them alone. But the decision when you say, I am self aware and I'm going to make a decision for me. That's where you start. And then from there, you say, I need to get this out. How do I heal? Listen to positive podcasts like this one. Go talk to a counselor. Those are my options for you. But the first thing that you have to understand in this season, too, or my podcast, is Mare Mirror on the Wall. Am I the one who holds it all? And you do. It's going to be a juicy season, ladies and gentlemen, with relationships. And I'm super excited. I'm going to have several guests to come on to talk about trials and tribulations and relationships, dating, marriage, divorce, and how self awareness helped them or not. Or maybe they haven't gotten there yet, but we're going to talk about it. So I'm super excited. Yes. Season two is here. Thank you. Moving on. And I pray and I pray that whatever you do in this season, that you show up and be your authentic, genuine self. Remember, is self love over everything.
Hey, what's up? It's Bianca. Renee here bianca on self love. I hope that you enjoyed the podcast today or tonight or this morning. Whenever you listen to it. Listen, be sure to check me out Beyond Self Love on all podcast platforms. Also, don't forget to check in with me, facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Beyond self love. Also check me out my new YouTube channel, Bianca's World. I got you. Listen, thank you. Self love gang. Remember always, is self love over everything? I'm out. Be Renee.